[ The clatter of the clipboard and the skittering of Kaveh's pen is as distant as the rest of the world. Because Alhaitham is terrible, he stops his hand briefly to slide the goggles from Kaveh's arm and lets those fall to the ground too. He shuts up any complaints with a hard, hungry kiss. ]
You say that every time. [ He murmurs, punctuating by squeezing Kaveh's length between his fingers. ] You need this as badly as I do.
[ Alhaitham will always say the hard truths out loud, even when Kaveh doesn't want to hear it. There's only one truth Alhaitham hasn't manifested into words despite thinking them at every brush with death. Alhaitham thought of it again at the end of this race, and he's thinking it now, heart hammering in his chest.
He leans back, supporting himself on his legs as he pulls Kaveh's pants and boxers to his knees. Alhaitham kisses Kaveh's collarbone, the center of his chest, and finally over one nipple standing beneath the fabric of his shirt. He would suck Kaveh off, but his patience is already wearing thin. ]
Do you have something? [ Lube, or a condom. He'd better. ]
[HIS GOGGLES!!! Alhaitham might muffle them, but Kaveh definitely makes indignant noises about it anyway, and he bites Alhaitham's lower lip when they break apart.
Unfortunately, Alhaitham's right about this, too. Kaveh should shove him off and check on his gear, but instead, he presses his forehead to Alhaitham's jaw, panting against his neck with every stroke of his long fingers. He should refuse to indulge Alhaitham, should put his foot down and force Alhaitham to listen to him--but instead, his hands find their way beneath that perfectly fitted uniform, confident in familiarity. It's probably embarrassing, the pleasure he derives just from taking Alhaitham in hand, but he's too keyed up to care. It's too easy to lose track of what he's supposed to be upset about when he's engulfed in Alhaitham like this.
That doesn't stop him from dropping his head back and pursing his lips in response to Alhaitham's question, though. It's not like he won't say the answer, but still... he hates proving Alhaitham right...]
I won't next time if you aren't more careful with my things. [TCH. Maybe he should leave them behind next time anyway, just to prove a point.] ...Behind you, in the red drawer. [The one labeled with his name, because Kaveh does technically share this space with other people, even if they all know it's basically his. He squeezes Alhaitham's cock--not meanly, but not too gently, either--and sinks his teeth into Alhaitham's collarbone for a moment, then withdraws with a groan and pushes him back.] Hurry.
[ He'll just get Kaveh new goggles? 🙄 And sure you will Kaveh
Hurry. The little betrayal of Kaveh's eagerness is worth the sharp pain in Alhaitham's lip, Kaveh's torturous hand squeezing over his cock. He staggers back at Kaveh's push, collarbone throbbing where Kaveh made his mark. Alhaitham catches himself on his feet, leaving Kaveh disheveled on the hood of the car. From his new vantage, he sees Kaveh in his entirety, flushed from kissing, caked in soot and oil, half-undressed and wanting.
The thought comes in a instant—of climbing back onto the hood of the car, of forgoing the opportunity to fuck to make Kaveh fall apart with Alhaitham's mouth and hands until he has nothing left to give. Kaveh's insistence is all that makes him abandon the impulse.
Later. He finally turns around and fishes out the familiar bottle of lube and a condom wrapped in purple plastic. He hesitated before the condom goes into his pocket, and Alhaitham begins to pour a generous amount of lube in his fingers before he joins Kaveh back on the car. He doesn't even close the drawer.
Alhaitham doesn't speak, instead surging his lips against Kaveh's with a sharp inhale as though he held his breath while they were apart. As Alhaitham bends one of Kaveh's thighs up against his side, a wet finger searches and prods at his entrance before slipping inside down to the knuckle. He lets it rest, lets Kaveh adjust, before he works it at a steadily growing pace.
He brushes his lips to Kaveh's cheek and murmurs: ]
I'm not doing this with anyone else.
[ It seems out of left field, but there's a point to it. Another finger slips inside, and Alhaitham lifts his head to watch Kaveh intently, even slows the pace of his fingers, stroking long, deep lines against Kaveh's prostate. ]
[YOU CAN JUST BUY YOUR WAY OUT OF TROUBLE, ALHAITHAM.
Fortunately, Alhaitham doesn't irritate him further. He doesn't go far enough for Kaveh to do anything but prop himself up on his elbows, but he does exactly that, catching his breath and letting his gaze rake over Alhaitham's tall frame. He could probably get his boots and pants all the way off if he really rushed, but they can't linger here, really--the chances of anyone barging in on them are low, but Alhaitham will be wanted sooner rather than later, and Kaveh's always turned him over to his work without mercy once their skin has cooled and their pulses have settled. He's not about to change that now, no matter how beautiful Alhaitham looks.
(He couldn't even if he wanted to. He won't allow himself that kind of sentimentality, especially not when he wants it so badly.)
He's rapidly losing his grip on his earlier anger, though. Alhaitham rejoins him with a breathless kiss, and Kaveh pulls him close with a complete lack of patience, letting himself fall back against the car and dragging Alhaitham down with him. It's not comfortable, but he doesn't care, far more concerned with sucking Alhaitham's lower lip into his mouth, with using Alhaitham's tongue to keep himself quiet as Alhaitham presses into him.
When Alhaitham breaks the kiss, Kaveh lets his head fall back and closes his eyes. He's too focused on steadying his breathing, on shifting his hips to help Alhaitham find that perfect angle, that the question catches him completely off guard.]
You--huh? [His eyes flutter back open in confusion, but he catches Alhaitham's intent gaze just as Alhaitham adds a second finger, and he can't stop himself from gasping at the combination. His hands had come to rest under Alhaitham's shirt, and they flex uselessly against his back now, as if Kaveh is trying to physically pull his focus back together.] What are you talking about?
[Alhaitham wants him to think coherently? In these conditions??]
The condom. Unless I have a reason for it, I'm not wearing it this time.
[ They'd spoken about their tests coming out clean, albeit after the first time they had sex, and since then they'd been safe when it came to penetration. Though the thought twisted his stomach into unrelenting knots, Alhaitham never assumed that he was Kaveh's only partner. Kaveh could be dense about the attention he receives from the rabble around him, but he could still find release in other people that won't just fuck him at work.
It isn't fair that Alhaitham acts like Kaveh is his. He shouldn't purposely leave so many marks on Kaveh's peach-soft skin where others can see it. He shouldn't close his hand over Kaveh's long and beautiful neck and make him gasp words that sound like love. He shouldn't delude himself into believing those words even for a moment. They shouldn't make him come as often as they do. Kaveh isn't his.
But after this close brush with death, Alhaitham needs him. He closes his lips over the ball of Kaveh's throat, feeling every syllable hum against his lips. He quickens the pace of his fingers, eventually adding a third. His half-hard cock drips precome in long threads over Kaveh's stomach. ]
[Of course Alhaitham would do this now, Kaveh would complain, if he had the breath for it. Of course he would wait until Kaveh is at his mercy, losing his mind with every pointed curl of Alhaitham's long fingers. Between the weight of his gaze and his relentless pace, Kaveh can barely catch his breath; he certainly isn't the mood to be having a conversation, especially not after the stunt Alhaitham pulled on the track.
But Kaveh's mind is never truly silent. He's almost never fully lost in pleasure, even when he's keyed up beyond belief. He processes Alhaitham's words too quickly to pretend like he didn't, a flush spreading over his face at the clear implications.
It's just Alhaitham being selfish, he'll tell himself later. When his skin is cool and he's alone with his thoughts again, it'll be easy to brush this off as self-centered arrogance. Alhaitham taking what he wants, as usual, with only the barest of courtesies to keep them both safe. Later, he'll remind himself that they're not lovers--that they're barely even friends, despite the unshakeable trust they place in each other with every race. Right now, though...
There's something in Alhaitham's tone. Something about the way his mouth finds Kaveh's throat. Something in his words that sounds like--]
Shit--[A jerk of his hips brings him up against Alhaitham, and the brush of Alhaitham's cock against his drags a gasp out of him, scattering his thoughts like dewdrops kicked off of flower petals. Yanked violently back into himself, he shifts, sliding his hands out from Alhaitham's shirt and instead burying one in his hair, the other finding its way down between Alhaitham's legs. His thoughts are banished, and there's the barest hint of viciousness in his touch, like he's trying to shove them further away by being more aggressive with Alhaitham.]
I thought I told you to shut up. [He still has it in him to grumble even when his legs won't stay still, when the slightest shift of Alhaitham's wrist could have him seeing stars in an instant. Despite his words, his touch is gentle as he wraps his fingers around Alhaitham and strokes, just the way he knows Alhaitham likes it best. Muttered--] ...Yeah. It's fine.
[He can't bring himself to say any more than that. Can't make it sound like it means anything, like it's anything more than a convenient coincidence. He can't let Alhaitham realize that his clinging isn't just driven by the physical--he can barely confront the terror he feels at the thought of losing Alhaitham, even in a non-literal sense. He barely even lets himself think about his own feelings. If he shows too much and Alhaitham is repulsed (or worse, unmoved), Kaveh doesn't know what he'll do.
Alhaitham can't know how much of Kaveh's world is him. But even for pretenses, Kaveh won't deny him this indulgence. Not when he needs it too.]
[ Yeah. It's fine. Even if Kaveh's intention is different, Alhaitham reads the answer as noncommittal—definitely not what Alhaitham wants to hear. It's not I've only ever slept with you since we met. It's You can fuck me raw. The risk you take is up to you.
Kaveh maintains that separation between them and it hurts. There's only a brief flash of that disappointment on Alhaitham's face before it's overtaken; it twists and slackens as Kaveh works his cock in his hand. Kaveh's hands are one of Alhaitham's favorite parts about him—deft, expert, intentional, gentle or unrelenting when the situation calls for it. They've made a trembling, slick mess of Alhaitham before, shiny with sweat and smeared with grime, and now they quickly bring him to fullness.
But he doesn't want to come just yet. He finally draws his fingers out from Kaveh, lubricant dripping from his knuckles, and slides them underneath Kaveh's hand to quickly oil his cock. Alhaitham slides back from the car hood onto his feet, and after he finds his footing, he pulls off and haphazardly tosses Kaveh's somewhere on the floor, not caring where. Kaveh's pants are next, shoved down to Kaveh's ankles as Alhaitham presses open-mouthed kisses to his thigh, the inner corner of his knee. He only manages to yank Kaveh's clothes from one leg before he climbs up the hood once again, diving down to catch Kaveh in a heavy, hungry kiss as his hips bear down.
Throughout all of this, Alhaitham is different than usual. Where he would be somewhat arrogant, teasing, bringing Kaveh to his breaking point for his own pleasure, he instead reflects Kaveh's urgency, frustrated at how many barriers are still between their bodies. He slides one hand up Kaveh's back, arching him upward to meet their chests. The other cards in his hair, pulling again to tilt his head. He bites Kaveh's lip, pries open his mouth, and licks deeply inside, searching for his taste. His thoughts are fogged with impatience and greed.
Alhaitham isn't an insecure person wallowing in self-doubt and perceived inadequacy. He knows precisely what he wants and that his own value has little to do with taking it. There is evidence that Kaveh wants him back just as badly. They wouldn't be doing this if he didn't. Until now, Alhaitham held back on actively pursuing him only for Kaveh's own sake, knowing that his misfortune and toils and history made it difficult for him to accept anyone's affections.
But, again, Alhaitham could have lost everything. He isn't concerned with his legacy or belongings, and there's no one left alive who would mourn him. There's only Kaveh and what could have been and how foolish it is to remain dishonest and ignore what makes Alhaitham feel whole. ]
[Alhaitham doesn't speak, and despite the pleasure that still flows between them, Kaveh isn't oblivious to the shift in the air. Something makes his stomach curl in inexplicable guilt, but it's impossible to focus long enough to figure out what, exactly, it is. Alhaitham's fingers are too clever, and Kaveh is too desperate to feel him, unable to figure out the words he wants and unwilling to pull away long enough to try.
(It's for the best, anyway. It would only make a mess of things, and then they'd both be left unsatisfied, bitter, and angry. That's not what either of them need right now.)
It's easier to push his doubts away once Alhaitham withdraws. The air shifts again, but in a different way--it's charged, frenetic in a way that transcends their usual haste. Kaveh can barely keep up as Alhaitham strips him further, his hands falling back to the hood of the car to keep himself balanced. When Alhaitham rejoins him, it's all Kaveh can do to keep himself on his elbows, caught up in the tide of Alhaitham's lust as he molds their bodies together and drinks Kaveh's sounds directly from his lips.
Kaveh's never been passive, though. He isn't one to be overwhelmed by Alhaitham's force, and that's certainly isn't about to change now--not when it took so long for his heart rate to slow earlier, even after he'd seen Alhaitham emerging from the flames unscathed. He meets Alhaitham's fervor with his own, parting his lips and coaxing Alhaitham's tongue into his mouth with his own, uncaring of the trail of spit that slips down his chin. He hooks his hand around the back of Alhaitham's neck, using him for stability as he reaches for Alhaitham's cock again. He doesn't bother with any more teasing strokes. Instead, he simply shifts until there's no space left between them, urging Alhaitham inside of him.
One last time, he's always said, even though he doesn't need to look, because he knows exactly how they fit together. One last time, except Kaveh hasn't thought about anyone else like this for as long as he can remember. One last time, because they barely get along, because he's been burned too many times before, because Kaveh thought he would rather die than disrupt their flawless synergy on the track, the one good thing he's been able to cling to as he desperately tries to turn his life around--but that was before Alhaitham almost did die, and perspective is an ever-changing thing.
Kaveh doesn't want to think about that, though. He doesn't want to think anymore at all, at least for a little bit. So he sucks Alhaitham's lip into his mouth and bears his hips down, his nerves alight with anticipation at the promise of skin on slick, warm skin.]
[ This, at least, is a language they can speak well. They show their desperation through bites, tongues, scraping nails and fingertips. Kaveh takes hold of his cock and the obvious impatience makes Alhaitham shudder, feeling himself swell as Kaveh presses Alhaitham against his entrance. When Kaveh bears down, Alhaitham's hips tilt upward to meet it until he pushes deeply inside.
Alhaitham abruptly ends their kisses in thin strings of spit, barely managing to swallow. His eyes screw shut as he groans, reaching to grasp Kaveh's thigh as their hips pull flush together. He wants desperately to fuck him, make Kaveh see stars and beg him to slow down. It takes most of his willpower not to.
It helps that when he finally opens his eyes, brows still furrowed, Kaveh is there. His hair is loose and fanned out around him. His skin is shiny with sweat, slicked with oil, and it makes his eyes shine like clear, clean rubies. His throat bobs with every breath. His neck is spotted with bites and bruises. He looks gorgeous, all of him, so much that it aches.
Alhaitham wants this to be his. Hearts don't work this way, acquiescing to other people's fervent desires, but he can't help it.
With the tips of his fingers, Alhaitham lifts Kaveh's head from the hood of the car. He slips his hand through Kaveh's hair, shielding the back of his head from the metal behind it. He mouths kisses against the side of Kaveh's neck, dragging his lips upward until they reach his ear. He still smells the smoke, tastes the sweat and ash against his lips. ]
Kaveh.
[ He mutters between labored breaths. Kaveh's name spins in his head, over and over. His knees ache against the hood, taking on all of his weight as he rolls his hips, steady and slow. He savors the tightness as it sucks him in, pushing until he's completely sheathed in Kaveh's body before pulling back out to the head. ]
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no subject
You say that every time. [ He murmurs, punctuating by squeezing Kaveh's length between his fingers. ] You need this as badly as I do.
[ Alhaitham will always say the hard truths out loud, even when Kaveh doesn't want to hear it. There's only one truth Alhaitham hasn't manifested into words despite thinking them at every brush with death. Alhaitham thought of it again at the end of this race, and he's thinking it now, heart hammering in his chest.
He leans back, supporting himself on his legs as he pulls Kaveh's pants and boxers to his knees. Alhaitham kisses Kaveh's collarbone, the center of his chest, and finally over one nipple standing beneath the fabric of his shirt. He would suck Kaveh off, but his patience is already wearing thin. ]
Do you have something? [ Lube, or a condom. He'd better. ]
no subject
Unfortunately, Alhaitham's right about this, too. Kaveh should shove him off and check on his gear, but instead, he presses his forehead to Alhaitham's jaw, panting against his neck with every stroke of his long fingers. He should refuse to indulge Alhaitham, should put his foot down and force Alhaitham to listen to him--but instead, his hands find their way beneath that perfectly fitted uniform, confident in familiarity. It's probably embarrassing, the pleasure he derives just from taking Alhaitham in hand, but he's too keyed up to care. It's too easy to lose track of what he's supposed to be upset about when he's engulfed in Alhaitham like this.
That doesn't stop him from dropping his head back and pursing his lips in response to Alhaitham's question, though. It's not like he won't say the answer, but still... he hates proving Alhaitham right...]
I won't next time if you aren't more careful with my things. [TCH. Maybe he should leave them behind next time anyway, just to prove a point.] ...Behind you, in the red drawer. [The one labeled with his name, because Kaveh does technically share this space with other people, even if they all know it's basically his. He squeezes Alhaitham's cock--not meanly, but not too gently, either--and sinks his teeth into Alhaitham's collarbone for a moment, then withdraws with a groan and pushes him back.] Hurry.
no subject
Hurry. The little betrayal of Kaveh's eagerness is worth the sharp pain in Alhaitham's lip, Kaveh's torturous hand squeezing over his cock. He staggers back at Kaveh's push, collarbone throbbing where Kaveh made his mark. Alhaitham catches himself on his feet, leaving Kaveh disheveled on the hood of the car. From his new vantage, he sees Kaveh in his entirety, flushed from kissing, caked in soot and oil, half-undressed and wanting.
The thought comes in a instant—of climbing back onto the hood of the car, of forgoing the opportunity to fuck to make Kaveh fall apart with Alhaitham's mouth and hands until he has nothing left to give. Kaveh's insistence is all that makes him abandon the impulse.
Later. He finally turns around and fishes out the familiar bottle of lube and a condom wrapped in purple plastic. He hesitated before the condom goes into his pocket, and Alhaitham begins to pour a generous amount of lube in his fingers before he joins Kaveh back on the car. He doesn't even close the drawer.
Alhaitham doesn't speak, instead surging his lips against Kaveh's with a sharp inhale as though he held his breath while they were apart. As Alhaitham bends one of Kaveh's thighs up against his side, a wet finger searches and prods at his entrance before slipping inside down to the knuckle. He lets it rest, lets Kaveh adjust, before he works it at a steadily growing pace.
He brushes his lips to Kaveh's cheek and murmurs: ]
I'm not doing this with anyone else.
[ It seems out of left field, but there's a point to it. Another finger slips inside, and Alhaitham lifts his head to watch Kaveh intently, even slows the pace of his fingers, stroking long, deep lines against Kaveh's prostate. ]
Are you?
no subject
Fortunately, Alhaitham doesn't irritate him further. He doesn't go far enough for Kaveh to do anything but prop himself up on his elbows, but he does exactly that, catching his breath and letting his gaze rake over Alhaitham's tall frame. He could probably get his boots and pants all the way off if he really rushed, but they can't linger here, really--the chances of anyone barging in on them are low, but Alhaitham will be wanted sooner rather than later, and Kaveh's always turned him over to his work without mercy once their skin has cooled and their pulses have settled. He's not about to change that now, no matter how beautiful Alhaitham looks.
(He couldn't even if he wanted to. He won't allow himself that kind of sentimentality, especially not when he wants it so badly.)
He's rapidly losing his grip on his earlier anger, though. Alhaitham rejoins him with a breathless kiss, and Kaveh pulls him close with a complete lack of patience, letting himself fall back against the car and dragging Alhaitham down with him. It's not comfortable, but he doesn't care, far more concerned with sucking Alhaitham's lower lip into his mouth, with using Alhaitham's tongue to keep himself quiet as Alhaitham presses into him.
When Alhaitham breaks the kiss, Kaveh lets his head fall back and closes his eyes. He's too focused on steadying his breathing, on shifting his hips to help Alhaitham find that perfect angle, that the question catches him completely off guard.]
You--huh? [His eyes flutter back open in confusion, but he catches Alhaitham's intent gaze just as Alhaitham adds a second finger, and he can't stop himself from gasping at the combination. His hands had come to rest under Alhaitham's shirt, and they flex uselessly against his back now, as if Kaveh is trying to physically pull his focus back together.] What are you talking about?
[Alhaitham wants him to think coherently? In these conditions??]
no subject
The condom. Unless I have a reason for it, I'm not wearing it this time.
[ They'd spoken about their tests coming out clean, albeit after the first time they had sex, and since then they'd been safe when it came to penetration. Though the thought twisted his stomach into unrelenting knots, Alhaitham never assumed that he was Kaveh's only partner. Kaveh could be dense about the attention he receives from the rabble around him, but he could still find release in other people that won't just fuck him at work.
It isn't fair that Alhaitham acts like Kaveh is his. He shouldn't purposely leave so many marks on Kaveh's peach-soft skin where others can see it. He shouldn't close his hand over Kaveh's long and beautiful neck and make him gasp words that sound like love. He shouldn't delude himself into believing those words even for a moment. They shouldn't make him come as often as they do. Kaveh isn't his.
But after this close brush with death, Alhaitham needs him. He closes his lips over the ball of Kaveh's throat, feeling every syllable hum against his lips. He quickens the pace of his fingers, eventually adding a third. His half-hard cock drips precome in long threads over Kaveh's stomach. ]
I want to know how you feel.
can't* buy wow imagine proofreading tags
But Kaveh's mind is never truly silent. He's almost never fully lost in pleasure, even when he's keyed up beyond belief. He processes Alhaitham's words too quickly to pretend like he didn't, a flush spreading over his face at the clear implications.
It's just Alhaitham being selfish, he'll tell himself later. When his skin is cool and he's alone with his thoughts again, it'll be easy to brush this off as self-centered arrogance. Alhaitham taking what he wants, as usual, with only the barest of courtesies to keep them both safe. Later, he'll remind himself that they're not lovers--that they're barely even friends, despite the unshakeable trust they place in each other with every race. Right now, though...
There's something in Alhaitham's tone. Something about the way his mouth finds Kaveh's throat. Something in his words that sounds like--]
Shit--[A jerk of his hips brings him up against Alhaitham, and the brush of Alhaitham's cock against his drags a gasp out of him, scattering his thoughts like dewdrops kicked off of flower petals. Yanked violently back into himself, he shifts, sliding his hands out from Alhaitham's shirt and instead burying one in his hair, the other finding its way down between Alhaitham's legs. His thoughts are banished, and there's the barest hint of viciousness in his touch, like he's trying to shove them further away by being more aggressive with Alhaitham.]
I thought I told you to shut up. [He still has it in him to grumble even when his legs won't stay still, when the slightest shift of Alhaitham's wrist could have him seeing stars in an instant. Despite his words, his touch is gentle as he wraps his fingers around Alhaitham and strokes, just the way he knows Alhaitham likes it best. Muttered--] ...Yeah. It's fine.
[He can't bring himself to say any more than that. Can't make it sound like it means anything, like it's anything more than a convenient coincidence. He can't let Alhaitham realize that his clinging isn't just driven by the physical--he can barely confront the terror he feels at the thought of losing Alhaitham, even in a non-literal sense. He barely even lets himself think about his own feelings. If he shows too much and Alhaitham is repulsed (or worse, unmoved), Kaveh doesn't know what he'll do.
Alhaitham can't know how much of Kaveh's world is him. But even for pretenses, Kaveh won't deny him this indulgence. Not when he needs it too.]
no subject
Kaveh maintains that separation between them and it hurts. There's only a brief flash of that disappointment on Alhaitham's face before it's overtaken; it twists and slackens as Kaveh works his cock in his hand. Kaveh's hands are one of Alhaitham's favorite parts about him—deft, expert, intentional, gentle or unrelenting when the situation calls for it. They've made a trembling, slick mess of Alhaitham before, shiny with sweat and smeared with grime, and now they quickly bring him to fullness.
But he doesn't want to come just yet. He finally draws his fingers out from Kaveh, lubricant dripping from his knuckles, and slides them underneath Kaveh's hand to quickly oil his cock. Alhaitham slides back from the car hood onto his feet, and after he finds his footing, he pulls off and haphazardly tosses Kaveh's somewhere on the floor, not caring where. Kaveh's pants are next, shoved down to Kaveh's ankles as Alhaitham presses open-mouthed kisses to his thigh, the inner corner of his knee. He only manages to yank Kaveh's clothes from one leg before he climbs up the hood once again, diving down to catch Kaveh in a heavy, hungry kiss as his hips bear down.
Throughout all of this, Alhaitham is different than usual. Where he would be somewhat arrogant, teasing, bringing Kaveh to his breaking point for his own pleasure, he instead reflects Kaveh's urgency, frustrated at how many barriers are still between their bodies. He slides one hand up Kaveh's back, arching him upward to meet their chests. The other cards in his hair, pulling again to tilt his head. He bites Kaveh's lip, pries open his mouth, and licks deeply inside, searching for his taste. His thoughts are fogged with impatience and greed.
Alhaitham isn't an insecure person wallowing in self-doubt and perceived inadequacy. He knows precisely what he wants and that his own value has little to do with taking it. There is evidence that Kaveh wants him back just as badly. They wouldn't be doing this if he didn't. Until now, Alhaitham held back on actively pursuing him only for Kaveh's own sake, knowing that his misfortune and toils and history made it difficult for him to accept anyone's affections.
But, again, Alhaitham could have lost everything. He isn't concerned with his legacy or belongings, and there's no one left alive who would mourn him. There's only Kaveh and what could have been and how foolish it is to remain dishonest and ignore what makes Alhaitham feel whole. ]
no subject
(It's for the best, anyway. It would only make a mess of things, and then they'd both be left unsatisfied, bitter, and angry. That's not what either of them need right now.)
It's easier to push his doubts away once Alhaitham withdraws. The air shifts again, but in a different way--it's charged, frenetic in a way that transcends their usual haste. Kaveh can barely keep up as Alhaitham strips him further, his hands falling back to the hood of the car to keep himself balanced. When Alhaitham rejoins him, it's all Kaveh can do to keep himself on his elbows, caught up in the tide of Alhaitham's lust as he molds their bodies together and drinks Kaveh's sounds directly from his lips.
Kaveh's never been passive, though. He isn't one to be overwhelmed by Alhaitham's force, and that's certainly isn't about to change now--not when it took so long for his heart rate to slow earlier, even after he'd seen Alhaitham emerging from the flames unscathed. He meets Alhaitham's fervor with his own, parting his lips and coaxing Alhaitham's tongue into his mouth with his own, uncaring of the trail of spit that slips down his chin. He hooks his hand around the back of Alhaitham's neck, using him for stability as he reaches for Alhaitham's cock again. He doesn't bother with any more teasing strokes. Instead, he simply shifts until there's no space left between them, urging Alhaitham inside of him.
One last time, he's always said, even though he doesn't need to look, because he knows exactly how they fit together. One last time, except Kaveh hasn't thought about anyone else like this for as long as he can remember. One last time, because they barely get along, because he's been burned too many times before, because Kaveh thought he would rather die than disrupt their flawless synergy on the track, the one good thing he's been able to cling to as he desperately tries to turn his life around--but that was before Alhaitham almost did die, and perspective is an ever-changing thing.
Kaveh doesn't want to think about that, though. He doesn't want to think anymore at all, at least for a little bit. So he sucks Alhaitham's lip into his mouth and bears his hips down, his nerves alight with anticipation at the promise of skin on slick, warm skin.]
no subject
Alhaitham abruptly ends their kisses in thin strings of spit, barely managing to swallow. His eyes screw shut as he groans, reaching to grasp Kaveh's thigh as their hips pull flush together. He wants desperately to fuck him, make Kaveh see stars and beg him to slow down. It takes most of his willpower not to.
It helps that when he finally opens his eyes, brows still furrowed, Kaveh is there. His hair is loose and fanned out around him. His skin is shiny with sweat, slicked with oil, and it makes his eyes shine like clear, clean rubies. His throat bobs with every breath. His neck is spotted with bites and bruises. He looks gorgeous, all of him, so much that it aches.
Alhaitham wants this to be his. Hearts don't work this way, acquiescing to other people's fervent desires, but he can't help it.
With the tips of his fingers, Alhaitham lifts Kaveh's head from the hood of the car. He slips his hand through Kaveh's hair, shielding the back of his head from the metal behind it. He mouths kisses against the side of Kaveh's neck, dragging his lips upward until they reach his ear. He still smells the smoke, tastes the sweat and ash against his lips. ]
Kaveh.
[ He mutters between labored breaths. Kaveh's name spins in his head, over and over. His knees ache against the hood, taking on all of his weight as he rolls his hips, steady and slow. He savors the tightness as it sucks him in, pushing until he's completely sheathed in Kaveh's body before pulling back out to the head. ]
You're perfect. You feel so good.