[What!? Getting screwed in some underbrush by the side of a road until his ass is numb while a donkey judges his life choices isn't the epitome of romantic first times!?

At first, Wei Wuxian's too overcome with delight and excitement at simply being picked up and carried off for a proper ravishing. His cheeks are flushed, eyes already filling with warmth and a misty dreaminess as he grins from ear to ear. He bursts out into giddy laughter when Lan Wangji shoves him against the tree, starting to tremble out of sheer reflex. His husband's mouth on his is bruisingly intense in the best of ways and Wei Wuxian kisses him back with equal fervor, hands splaying out on his shoulder.

After a moment he breaks the kiss to softly murmur:]

There you are, good boy.

[And then he immediately slips into his usual role when indulging in this particular fantasy.]

But you're being so rough, Er-Gege! The great and powerful Hanguang-jun manhandling fragile little me so brutishly! Does your uncle know what a savage he raised? It's a good thing we're out in the wild!

[Yeah, sure, some trees a very short walk away from the main road counts as the wild, Wei Wuxian. But least, he shut up for a couple of moments there?]